很好。。

很好，似乎大家都已经忘了这个blog的存在。。这样，就更像我的日记了。hoho...

最近。。

最近睡眠都不太好，之前是因为室友比较吵，房间又没有空调。这几天又好像一到晚上就总是不想睡觉。其实是困的，但是就是不想睡，不想一个人睡。昨天晚上就是这样。。照理说我这一年来几乎都是一个人睡的，反而是当陈玥回来的时候睡得不太踏实。可是这两天真的不想一个人睡。其实挺多时候都挺喜欢一个人住的，因为安静自由，没有人干扰。不知道是不是最近开始觉得有点寂寞了，不过放假以后的生活真的是比较无聊就是了，又见不到什么人。算了，就承认是怕寂寞吧。。也没什么好丢脸的。。我真的是那种不能少了朋友的人。可偏偏上了大学以后，朋友的流动性就很大。我有很多朋友，也很容易交到朋友，但是总是觉得似乎没什么很深交的朋友。这里的室友也不想高中的那几个那么互相了解。失败吗？呵呵。。

晕。。。上一篇居然是那个。。

很晕，上一篇居然是interview之前的。。。之后又发生了多少事情啊。。

突然又用这个写东西，主要是因为MSN的那个，老爸老妈也能看见。有些东西还是会不像让他们看到，不是可以隐瞒，只是不认为他们可以很顺利地接受。如果让他们有什么误解，要我花很多时间去解释，那还不如不让他们看到。张韶涵的一首叫MAMA的歌里，就是唱了这样的感觉。我本以为张韶涵在台湾应该还挺红的，可是好像不是。。

我想写的是昨天到今天用了挺长时间看的一篇BL的文章。故事写得挺不错的。之前看仙流的一篇文也用了很久。。真佩服那些人可以写那么长，构思那样长的一个故事一定很辛苦。最近看了很多同人的故事和漫画。昨天晚上看的“康熙来了”也正好请了三个男同性恋，其中一个其实是双性恋。同人，喜欢的人一定不会说成是gay,用gay这样的字眼就好像加紧了很多鄙视的东西。同人的话，就像绝爱里最经典的一句：我不是同性恋，只是我爱上的人碰巧是个男的。并不是很喜欢绝爱，因为很辛苦，爱的好累哦，而且晃司有点BT的感觉。
记得以前曾经做过一个小问卷之类的，中间又问到如果朋友中出现同性恋，能不能接受。当时我的回答是不能。其实现在也还是，因为那些觉得现实中的同性恋真的是给画成了一个样，就是给人不舒服的感觉。其实也只有在漫画和小说中才能看着让人觉得不难受，因为漫画中的人可以很漂亮，就可以直接把中间的那个小受当成是女生就行了。现实中，会有些受不了。不过那天康熙来了中的那个双性恋给人的感觉真的很舒服，一点都不做作，虽然他也有修眉毛和化妆，但真得让人觉得很舒服的那种，因为他真的很漂亮。所以写了这许多的结论就是，可能还是要因人而异，不知道如果我的朋友之中真的出现这样的人，我会怎样处理。抑或者，我压根就回去回避这些人？不过，真的不想承认自己并不是那么包容。。。

First interview on Jan 6th

Suprisingly, I will have my first interview from USC on Jan 6th. I only submitted the application a week before and almost the last minute (as always), but they said they are going to conduct a phone interview. Joseph said it's good to have an interview early, which means they are interested in me and I might be on the top of their list. So what I need to do now is to prepare for it. haha, I was kidding. I know I won't start preparing for it until January... Let's have a nice Christmas break first~~~

Depressed...........

by many reasons....

gonna have a final one hour later

Ya, as said in the title, i am going to have a final one hour later. but I am still blogging.. I am not well prepared, not at all, but I am not using my last time carefully.. That final is only 25% for the final and it's somehow hard that you don't know how detail the prof gonna test you and from the sample questions that he gave us, I don't think revision can help a lot. He simply asked a lot of details that didn't appear in the notes. perhaps he talked about those in lectures, but I skipped many classes because the class is boring and somehow too late... it's 5pm.... anyway, do some final revision la~~~~

can't concentrate on my revision at all...

I think I just got too much things to do this semester, so I couldn't do anything well... I messed things up.... Could you please lend me some of your luck? Hope God can see my effort.. More and more recently, I talked about God, perhaps now I am really believing in God.. Well, what I am going to say is that, God, if you are really existing among us, please do me a favor, or play some magic for me... A Christian won't say this way i know, so I am not a Christian yet.. hehe... I really hope there is someone who can play some magic for me.. still upset...

Finally got the GRE score...

Finally, after a long waiting, got the GRE score.. not very good and so very disappointed... also didn't do well in today's final and also a project report which worths 40% of the total grade... upset....